Tag: c marshall

An Ode to the Ironworker

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I was looking through C Marshall Fabrication’s products on this website, and I have to admit, I was rather impressed by the ironworker machines. Forget even about what they can do: the name itself is pretty Old School tough-sounding. I just get the idea that if I was walking around with one, I wouldn’t have to worry about getting mugged in a dark alley. If I did actually run into any trouble, I could use my ironworker to shear, notch and punch holes into my enemy, assuming of course that my enemy was less than an inch thick. Quite a practical machine indeed, in addition to its cool name.

In an eager quest to find out more, I turned to my old friend Google and started searching the web for ironworkers. I wanted to find out what the original ironworker was, what it looked like, and where it came from.

Based on my extensive internet research into the subject, the predecessors to the modern ironworker machine originated from the northernmost parts of Europe, as early as 7000 BC. Although the original models were described as rather short and ugly, they were also associated with superior results in smithing, mining and crafting. The original word for these ironworkers was “dweorg”, which later became the word “dwarf”. A noble heritage indeed, steeped as it is in myth, mystery and even the supernatural!

What I found out next led me, quite frankly, to an uncomfortable impasse: a professional conflict of interest. For, although I never conceived of the possibility that C Marshall Fabrication isn’t offering the best of the best metal fabrication machinery available anywhere on the planet, I must confess in the name of being fair and balanced that Google did lead me to one ironworker with a very refined and unique feature that, quite frankly, the ones on C Marshall’s website do not offer. Sure, C Marshall’s ironworkers can shear, punch, notch and bend at least as well or better than any others on the market – but can they SING?

That’s right: I found an ironworker that can sing. So well, in fact, that Old Blue Eyes is getting a run for his money right now. Meet Gary Russo, a New York City ironworker on the 2nd Avenue subway line. On his lunch breaks, he sings Frank Sinatra songs to whoever might be walking down the street at the time. He’s so good that he has captured national attention, and his fan base is growing quickly. You can watch a YouTube video of one of his recent performances here: Singing Ironworker . He sounds so much like Frank Sinatra that some people have in fact questioned whether he’s just lip synching to the real Frank Sinatra voice (he isn’t).

So, although I am a mere spectator of the metal fabrication industry, I wonder if it would be too much to offer an ironworker on this website that can sing in addition to its other features. Based on the steadily increasing number of Gary Russo’s fan base, it might be just the thing that provides the ultimate competitive advantage. Of course, it might help if the ironworkers on C Marshall’s website looked a little more like Gary Russo too. I probably wouldn’t be the only female who finally breaks down and buys one.

-Anja Wulf

Practical Uses for Magnetic Boy in the metal industry

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Once again this week, I threw myself wholeheartedly into a Google search for the largest metal object in the world, if only because I know that my scores of avid followers on this blog have all been holding their breath since I brought this subject up in last week’s blog entry. And once again this week, I got completely sidetracked. You would have too, after scanning the Google results for “large metal object”.

Just so you can have a better understanding of what came up on this search, here are a few samples:

“A large metal object drifts slowly through space…”

“An unusually high-velocity large metal object concealed in the nasal septum.”

“Large metal object found located under sea”

“Trapped inside a large metal object flying for ten hours.”

“Large metal object falls from sky in Roosevelt”

“A college student was killed in a freak accident when, according to police, a large metal object fell on him Friday”

“I have a large metal object caked in cement. “

“Have you ever wanted your very own custom-made metal object?

I admit that an unusually high-velocity large metal object concealed in the nasal septum REALLY grabbed my interest for a while, but I just couldn’t figure out how to turn that into something relevant to C Marshall and my thousands of devoted readers on this site. So on went my search, with many detours, until my search fingers were stopped dead in their tracks by the following Google result:

“Magnetic Boy, 7, attracts electronic and metal objects”

The first thing I did, of course, was click on the above and read the information about this Magnetic Boy. It came from a legitimate source and there was no air of “hoaxiness” in it.

Then I watched the video. You can watch it for yourself right here: Magnetic Boy

Folks, this kid is for real. He’s magnetic. Metal is attracted to him and sticks to him. In the video, he’s got forks and knives and the TV remote stuck all over his chest. No one else in his family is magnetic and of course there’s no good explanation for this, but there is no denying that this boy is a human magnet. He’s not allowed near the computer because he makes it go weird. I’m sure he’ll have a lot of trouble with credit cards, cell phones and electronic keys too. For some reason he can even get china plates to stick to him. However, because this is a blog about metal and metal machinery, we don’t really care about the china plates, do we?

Imagine having a magnetic boy of your own. You wouldn’t need a metal detector anymore: you could take him to the beach to find buried treasure, coins and jewelry. Once a huge chest of gold coins gets stuck to his chest, you can cash out and buy yourself a sturdy boat. Now you’re really in business: load up the kid on your boat and head for the high seas. Sooner than later, giant shipwrecks, plane wrecks and other metal objects of all kinds will get sucked to the ocean’s surface and you can help yourself to what you want and sell the rest as scrap metal. Now that you’re the scrap metal king of the world, you can take him to Ghana or Venezuela or Mexico or Nevada to find gold and other underground precious metals. You’ll already have the cash from your scrap metal operation to fund your mining business.

Now you can retire in style and pretty much do what you want. You might feel inclined to contribute to the betterment of humanity by renting out your kid to the military to ferret out terrorist organizations by finding their weapons stashes. Once that mission has been accomplished, you can rejoice that you have now created world peace.

I wasn’t able to find any more recent updates on the Magnetic Boy. Is it possible that he already went underground and had something to do with finding bin Laden’s location?

I wouldn’t rule it out.

-Anja Wulf

Steel hull construction for mega yachts is huge moneymaker

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I’ve recently been spending a disproportionate amount of my time working on a boat. By boat, I mean a 39-ft sail boat (or cruiser, if you prefer) that we are planning to sail to the Caribbean in a few weeks. Anyone who’s owned or worked with boats will tell you that the amount of work that goes into the maintenance and upkeep of one cannot possibly be exaggerated. Re-sanding and re-varnishing the entire interior is just the icing on the cake. The electrical needs rewiring in places, the plumbing needs an overhaul, the hull needs to be scraped and repainted, the windows need to be painted and installed, and the list just keeps going on from there. In fact, it’s kind of depressing just writing about it, considering that our plan is to leave at the end of the month.

So in order to cheer myself up a bit, I decided to do a little online shopping for mega yachts. I figure if it’s this much work to maintain and prep a 39 foot boat, mega yacht owners must be offering a lot of money just to unload their boats to some poor sucker like me.

I found one that I thought was kind of cute. In case you think this has nothing to do with metal fabrication machinery, think again. This ship’s hull is made entirely of steel. It has 8 decks and platforms. Aluminum alloys are used for the manufacturing process, which are formed of seven modules which in their turn were assembled out of several different sections.

The overall length of the boat is 158 meters. For those of you who don’t know miles from meters, an average city block is about 160 meters. The upper deck also comes fully equipped with a dock hangar providing landing sites for 2 helicopters, as well as 2 locations for refueling them. So yes, that’s a lot of metal right there.

Described as a “jewel of design”, the yacht also features a huge hall with 3-story high columns, a multiple dome arched ceiling, balconies and numerous luxurious staircases, a “winter garden” described as a “real paradise corner” featuring multiple swimming pools, waterfalls, trees and lanais, and a pier for pleasure boats – sort of an island within the boat.

The central part of the yacht is built in the image of an altar and features a Throne Hall, statues of 7 major saints, golden balls which are supposed to reflect the Glory of God, golden halos, and fresco paintings attesting to the Life and Acts of God and the Saints. The main statue is a statue of God with a golden face, which “can easily be rotated around its axis, staying always to face the congregation”.

According to its own listing, “the whole appearance of the yacht is subordinated to one central message: Glory and Grandeur of show-power-Simplicity, availability and proximity to us – our Lord”.

Personally, I don’t have a clue what this is supposed to mean, but by now I’m starting to form a vague idea that the maintenance of this boat might be a little more than I could comfortably handle. I’m also thinking that the cost of filling up her tank would be more than what I earn in an entire year.

Which, of course, makes me even more confident that the owners must be willing to pay a lot of money to someone who’d volunteer for the responsibility of being saddled with this boat.

Not so: they are actually planning on selling it to some poor sucker. Asking price: 277,000,000 Euros.

If that’s what they mean by “availability and proximity to us – our Lord”, then I’d say there might be just a wee bit of false advertising going on here.

The good news for the metal industry is that there seems to be a lot of money to be made in the construction of these monster yachts. Take note, folks: I appear to have stumbled upon an excellent target market for C Marshall Fabrication, as well as metal machinery outfits in general. Think of the amount of steel needed to construct a hull of this size!

The other good news is, I’m feeling a little more comfortable with my 39-foot sailboat.

-Anja Wulf